today.

they tell me my problem is that i can't see past the present. i long to tell them they don't understand life. why should i plan for a future that isn't certain to exist - that in all reality may not exist tomorrow. why not plan simply for the day i'm living. the best laid plans are liable to go awry, and planning gives them time to plot. they tell me i'm being paranoid, unrealistic, but thoughts tend to have a life of their own and i can't pretend that they don't. words are everywhere and they surprise me with their viciousness and their unpredictable nature. they do not correspond to emotions, do not bend to my will, and i find them on the page with no intention of mine pushing them there. i can't help this fact, the words that spill from my mouth or pen in order to attack or eulogize the world at large. drama is the charm of life, but i'm so tired of it. living day to day you lose the sordid desire to dramatise every second of your life, but when it's inflicted upon you there will always be the urge to participate. so my advice is plan only for today, live only for today, and let tomorrow form itself without panic. it's the only way to live, and surely the only way to die.